Hi all!  I’m back! 

As I told you in my last blog the grand idea I had to add blogging to my online presence turned out to be a little too much on my plate.  I have not left it and would love to get back to more of it in time, but as I grow into being the more efficient version of myself I have to learn to stop overextending.  I’m a work in progress there.  Being well-rounded is fantastic, but being sharply focused on goals is important as well.  I have been working on the ladder.  I have an incredible group of women in my online wellness community + my business mentorship (you can learn about it here) and they always lead my priorities.  Sharing the tips and tools that have helped me to lead these women is a passion I get to see flourish here.

So, in this post I WILL NOT be talking politics or the health conditions. 

I want to get and give high vibes.  I want to stay high vibes.  I want to pass on high vibes.  And that just doesn’t come from any opinion I’ve seen thrown out on social media.  I have been called out for not sharing my opinion.  But, I have shared it.  I have been called out for not donating:

“But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.”  -Matthew 6:3

“Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” -2 Corinthians 9:6-8

I donate all the time.  Not only in 2020. That is all I need to share about that.

But, listen.  Because I am not going to talk here about the politics, schools, masks, riots, or any of those other views doesn’t mean I won’t have a heartfelt or serious conversation on it.  I don’t have a problem being me and having people disagree with it.  But, I feel like the best information on these subjects (masks, schools, virus statistics, politics) do not come from a blog by a mom from Oregon sitting in her home office. Oh, and definitely not Facebook.  We are all so tired of seeing this stuff on Facebook, right?  What used to be fun is exhausting.  In fact; I tend to unfriend, unfollow, or snooze posts on these subjects at this point.  If you are exhausted about it I also recommend this for you.  

Okay, so what my little family has been up to?  That’s what I want to tell you about.

So, we went to Maui in early 2020.  We stayed here for almost a week and I didn’t tell social media at all.  It was my gift to my family.  I work a lot in my home and my children watch me work.  I like it because they get to see the example of hard work.  And I like it even more when they get the rewards of the hard work they have seen.  So, I snuck them off to Maui.

Anyone who considers this life of creating dreams at home; let me tell you that you get to live life on your terms no matter what you do.  You map your success and (here’s the big old key) follow that road you mapped.  But, don’t worry about whether your route is different than others.  Just stay your course. I didn’t do this in year one. I did this in year 3. At the end of it. Because I didn’t quit and worked hard in years 1-3.

It was amazing to gift my family with a week focused on them. A week of taking pictures of them for memories and not of me for work. I have shared very few pictures of our trip only months after it and I will be making them into a book for my kids. We decided a secret getaway will continue to be a tradition I give them.

Then the fury of 2020 hit and we hung out together as a family a lot. Ironically, although my work and my travel provide so many opportunities for my family I did tell myself I would be more selective on my travel in 2020 to spend time with them. I don’t feel much guilt about traveling. My job allows me to be home with my kids alllllll.the.time. Traveling for a long weekend is still less time away that I would be in a typical 9-5. But, turns out God took care of that idea I had about how to restrict travel a bit!

So, we first played a lot of family games and boardgames.  More than we have ever done.  Phase 10, Candyland, Uno, Trouble, Guess Who, Eye Found It, Sorry, and Clue are some of the ones we had on repeat around here. We played until we just could not. One that we laughed the hardest as a family at is Not Parent Approved. Think edgy but totally family-approved Cards Against Humanity or Apples to Apples. Sloan’s were hilarious because she can’t fully read yet and when her cards won we died laughing!

We also watched a lot of lip sync concerts around here.

We had 2020-style birthdays.  Home, yard signs, neighbors, and loved ones passing by.  I told my friends it reminded me of the simple parties we had in our youth.  I loved it.  So did my kids.  They both said it was their best birthday ever!  (Sloan’s birthday is November so she has yet to experience her 2020 birthday).

I have had a lot of people ask my about our Yard Signs. They are from a local company that drops off and picks up. But, the baby pictures were poster size pictures blown up on Costco.com photo site and hot glued to poster board from the dollar store. The kids LOVED them and both have them in their rooms now!

We watched a lot of family movies.  I got to actually learn more about my children.  They played outside a lot.  My husband, who is a Varsity baseball coach and is gone quite a bit also got to know our kids better.  He got to watch them play and see the dynamics with their peers.

Somewhere along the way one of my neighbors started an outdoor Happy Hour.  We live in the best neighborhood.  How this little slice of heaven- tons of kids and amazing families- got to be ours is a dream we somehow manifested.  We started the Happy Hour out at a scheduled time in the cold wrapped up around fire pits with our own lawn chairs, with our own snacks, and our own drinks, and families sitting together 6 feet apart.  It turned into rotating driveways, hot nights, looking for each other to just pop out, and bringing our chairs down to spread out and connect.  It has been my saving grace during all of this.

We have connected as a neighborhood more than ever and I again reminded my peers this feels like neighborhoods before social media and on demand living as a whole. 

My kids still did school.  On our schedule.  They read, they played, they did PE, they had quiet time, math time, art, science, history, and socialization.  We worried less about the structure and more about the soul and the growth.

My son who thrives in school and often says it’s too easy struggled a little bit with learning through technology and we welcomed it as extra rigor and growth.  We had the opportunity to show him life isn’t always easy and to teach him perseverance.  He complained he missed the old school and we told him this was a chance to learn something new.

Initially I stressed about what they were losing not being in school. Soon I realized all they were gaining.  We began to teach our 5 year old to read and it was a joy to see it first hand. She started math lessons she wouldn’t have begun until a year later, breezed through them, and woke asking to do them.  She started nightly journaling of circling multiple choices or answering prompts with a few words.

My oldest had  less time for her favorite school activity; socialization with friends.  This just meant this talkative girl had more time to socialize with me.  I learned so much about her, we have become much closer, and she is picking up some assistant duties around the Autum Chetock business we run. She is a natural leader so she began also helping around the house and with her siblings in exchange for pay or goods (clothes she wanted, of course).

Do I love this model of life best of all?  I cannot say I do.  I realize I have shared so many joys here thus far, but honestly it’s been hard.  I would prefer them all in school and out of the house so I could have more quiet time and productivity.  However, my mindset is my superpower.  We seek joy in this home.  My biggest blessings are the 4 people I share this home with and right now they are all safe and healthy with me.  The highest joy on my list is checked off. 

I also was dealt two knee surgeries during 2020.  Late February 2020 I was hosting a retreat for the leaders I mentor.  We were taking pictures and they wanted to jump for a picture. Ironically, the first time I didn’t jump  But, we decided to retake the photo. I decided to jump.  And when I came down I felt my knee pop.  Everyone laughs when I say although I have a regular and consistent routine for working out I injured my knee jumping for a picture. But there you have it.

I had injured this knee previously (Fall 2017) and was told it was probably a strain.  I instantly thought I strained it again.  But, it calmed and I was able to walk.  We walked a bit over a mile and I was serving them dinner in my home (I know….. remember when we openly served our friends in our homes?).  I turned and felt my knee pop again.  It swelled almost instantly.

I will save you some of the details, but I tried to deal on my own.  When it got worse I made an appointment to see the doctor.  I was told (without imaging) it was a sprain and was sent on my way.  Then it got worse again.

  By that time the medical world was up in arms and I was stuck with video appointments and being told nothing could be done.  I went to referral after referral by phone or video and ended in a video physical therapy appointment.  That PT confirmed I needed imagining and as soon as it was allowed I would be scheduled.  I went the day it was allowed.  They diagnosed me with a torn meniscus that would need repair.  I went into a knee surgery hoping it would be a 4-6 week recovery.  I came out being told, “The space where your ACL should be is a black hole.  You will need a replacement for that as well.”

At five weeks from healing from the first surgery we finally got out and went to the National Park in our backyard. Okay, it’s hours away, but at 40 I hadn’t been and it was well worth the trip. Thankful life had me slow down enough for it. I knew I was coming up on another surgery and we needed out of the house. If you haven’t been to Crater Lake it is breathtaking and I highly recommend it.

Six weeks after healing from the first surgery I was in for the second.  While I run a business focused on health and movement I was stuck in a long length of time of restricted movement. I was challenged, but not defeated. We just can never be defeated, loves. In my business I often hear the phrase, “I feel defeated.” That’s a red flag to me. We are never defeated. You can feel tested. Try that instead.

Today I sit here about 6.5 weeks post surgery #2. That’s 12.5 weeks from surgery 1. I have been out of a knee brace for 4 days as I wrap up this post.  This feels like a huge freedom after being in one for almost 6 months. The knee is still needing a lot of rehab, but I am grateful.  I told my doctor and PT every step of the way instead of telling me what I can’t do; let’s focus on what I can.  I have been active probably a total of 5 out of the 6 months of injury.  I modified, I did what I could, and I spent every day focusing my energy on the good news.

Speaking of news; in the not good news category; two days after my second and more major (ACL reconstruction) surgery my son fell and broke his elbow.  I was still hooked to an ice machine 24/7 and couldn’t move much at all. I like to joke- or maybe not so much joke- that the injury wouldn’t have happened if mom was on her feet.  Dad had to take him to the ER, to surgery at the local children’s hospital, and then care for us both and the two active sisters for a while.  So, while this family is normally outdoors and active in the summer we were creative about being outdoors and not so active.  

I guess back to the good news is that if it all is if this had to happen at least it’s this summer and at least it’s while our HOA pool is closed for the summer.  I’m not sure how we would’ve navigated missing the pool all summer otherwise. Well, at least this mom listening to the kids whine about it.  I don’t know how I would have done it. Haha.  And that if I had to have two knee surgeries and be down for this long at least it was the same year my trips to Punta Cana, New Orleans, Sonoma wine country, Vegas, and Scottsdale were cancelled anyway.  Again- if I want to be upset instead I can be so thankful. 

It’s been a YEAR for the books in more ways than I can tell you now; but I am confident I will soon.  Yes- there is more.  A lot more.  I have shared here and on my social media I was writing a book.  Early 2020 led to the start of my second book and then Summer 2020 led to the start of my third.  I shared with you the Enneagram 7 in me is a serial starter, but I am determined to finish one soon.  I start them when the idea is flowing and go with it.  That’s why the blog is slower than I originally hoped.  I write daily and put it where I am led to put it.  And when it’s here enough a new post will be up.  It’s much like I teach in my bootcamps.  Forward motion is forward motion.  You can go fast or slow, but you will get to the finish line eventually.  But, the person who sits on the track or turns and goes home won’t.  Keep going.

I know 2020 has been trying for us all.  Change is hard for humankind as a whole in the moment but the best for us all in the end.  We are are all collectively in change right now.  One thing I am confident in is that the season of struggle is not forever.  You will grow or retreat during it.  And what happens on the other end comes from what you decide to do in that time.

I hope you’re growing.  

Oh, and when this whole health crisis is said  and done take a vacation, stay off social media, and don’t tell anyone about it. Let your feet be grounded and your lungs breathe the air.  Let the pictures be for memories and not to show anyone.  Live.

xoxo-Autum